Saturday, December 29, 2007

My Conservative Christmas

We bought my dad this hilarious book for Christmas - If Democrats Had Any Brains, They'd Be Republicans by Ann Coulter.  Chapters include: George W. Bush: The Guy I'd Most Like to Have a Nonalcoholic Beer With, Christians: Must Reproduce More, Bill Clinton: He Left a Mark on History That May Never Come Out, Communism: A New Frangrance By Hillary, Democrat Ideas (See Also: Marx, Lenin), Iraq: A New Reality Show, and "Liberal Patriotism" and Other Oxymorons.  It's awesome!

In the latest edition of Glenn Beck's magazine, Fusion, we got a copy of the poltically correct nativity story.  That was really funny.  I tried to find a copy on Google, because I don't feel like typing the whole thing out.  No use...

Friday, December 28, 2007

Hairspray Bad, Stardust Good

I had a really bad headache this morning, and spent sometime worshipping the porcelain gods.  It stunk.  But then I decided to watch "Hairspray", because I had nothing better to do (from my outpost on the couch).  I got through 20 minutes.  Turtles - you should be proud I got that far.  That was one of the most racist movies I've ever seen!  Not to mention, I'm not much of a musical person anyway unless it's actually about something interesting.  Then I finally turned it off once I looked at the back it was only rated PG, and none of the reasons had anything to do with racism.  Sick...  I can't believe Queen Latifah was in a movie like that.  Normally she's one of my favorite actresses.

Then I watched "Stardust", which was an awesome movie!  I loved it!  It was completely predictable, but it was great anyway.  If you haven't seen it, I definitely suggest it.  I don't have anything bad to say about it.  And if you do choose to watch it, take a look at the blooper reel.  The entire thing is worth it for Triston's "stunt" on the throne with the ruby.  Ha, ha...  Oh, and how can you forget the dead princes in the Peanut Gallery.  They were hilarious.

Season 2 of "Rome" was really good.  I'm finished with it already.  Atia wasn't as funny as she was in season 1, but I loved the "presidence" argument with Octavian's wife at the triumph when he returns from Egypt.  And Eirene should not have died!

I hope everyone had an enjoyable winter solstice holiday!

Monday, December 24, 2007

Christmas - Past to Present

Yes, I'm sure you all saw this coming, but I couldn't resist!  As you probably have guessed already, Christmas wasn't a new idea when Rome was in the Christianization (yup, this one's a real word!) process.

There was a popular Roman festival known as the Saturnalia that mark the winter solstice and also honored there god Saturn (where we got the name for the planet).  More importantly, it was time for visiting friends, giving gifts, and general merriment.

“This festival [The Saturnalia]… usually occurred around December 25 on the ancient Julian calendar. During Saturnalia the Romans feasted, postponed all business and warfare, exchanged gifts, and temporarily freed their slaves.”

- Encarta Encyclopedia

"All of the similarities between Saturnalia and Christmas are no accident.  Christians in the fourth century assigned December 25 as Christ's birthday because pagans already observed the day as a holiday.  This would sidestep the problem of eliminating an already-popular holiday while Christianizing the population.”

- Don’t Know Much About Mythology

There is little doubt that Pope Julius I was trying to make conversion as quick and painless as possible.  It was a convenient day to make a holiday, the foremost of which was the presence of the Saturnalia festival, but there were also other reasons that made this a handy day to party.

~ Attis, the vegetable god of the Persians and divine husband of Cybele (many times earlier mentioned), had his birth date on the 25 of December.

~ Mithraism was the Persian cult of the god Mithra, and was very popular among the soldiers of Rome for his emphasis on honor and courage.  It recognized a celebration on December 25 when Mithra supposed born.  As Mithraism sees it, Mithra was killed, buried in a rock tomb, and then resurrected three days later.  Crazy, I know.

~ The Egyptian god, Osiris, was originally a deity of life and vegetables and had a birthdayon the 25.  (Oh!  Before I forget, remember when Riley hugs the “significant, bluish-green man with the weird goatee” in the first National Treasure?  That was Osiris, as he was often portrayed with green skin when he was patron of the veggies.  You can show off to your friends sometime using that random tidbit.)  Later after he was killed, he replaced Anubis as lord of the underworld (sounds a lot better than “patron of vegetables”) (Anubis would become god of judgment).  Osiris was killed once as well, but he got better.  =)

~ Adonis, a youth in Greek myth who had the goddesses Persephone and Aprodite chasing after him (lucky guy!).  He was killed by a wild boar when he went hunting, and the two smitten divinities rushed to Zeus, each begging him to restore Adonis to them.  Zeus decreed that Adonis would spend winter months with Persephone and summer months with Aprodite.  His story came to represent the natural cycle of life and death, another symbol borrowed by Christians.  And yes… you guessed it… his birthday was the 25.

~ Dionysus, the Greek god of wine and drunken revelry (he hosted an interesting party known as Dionysia (or Dionysian Mysteries)).  And, again, his birthday was the 25, as usual.

~ In the Nativity story, the baby Jesus is presented with gold, frankincense and myrrh by an unidentified number of Zoroastrian priests.  (The Bible never actually states there were three.  It’s presumed that there were three, because there were three gift present.  And they definitely weren’t kings.  They were magi.)  The same gifts were given to the baby Krishna of Indian mythology when he was born.

All in all, it worked out pretty well to have December 25 as the birthday of Christ.  It just made Christianizing a lot simpler, because imagine having to eliminate the Christmas from America’s calendar today.  It would take an absurd amount of work, and neither we, nor the fourth century popes wanted to do that.

Happy holidays!!!!!!!!!! =)

We've had this adorable opossum visiting our snack feeders for the critters during the day.  I walk right outside up next to him and take his picture and he doesn't mind.  His name is Ziggy.

Sunday, December 23, 2007

National Treause: Book of Secrets

I went and saw "National Treasure: Book of Secrets"!  It was awesome I thought!  The beginning was a little bit fast, but I loved the part with Riley signing his books (at Borders!  That made me laugh.).  Ha, ha... he's the best.

I got a little confused with the secret message that Ben's mom sent him.  It never really explained code "hummingbird".  That was weird.

I don't think that Abigail should've broken up with Ben at the beginning.  That was kind of dumb.  But it was funny when she found Ben in the house and was trying to figure out how he got in past the alarm.  "Where's Riley?!"

I'm not sure the name was a good choice either.  I would've titled it "National Treasure: City of Gold", because the Book of Secrets was important, however that's not what the whole movie revolved around.

I thought that the treasure chamber was a lot cooler in the second movie too. 

Overall, I definitely thought it was great.  I want to go see it again!

Shopping

I went Christmas shopping this morning (at Borders, of course)!  And I finished with Don't Know Much About History and have started reding The Argonautika.  If your not familiar with it (I'll be brief!), it's the story of Jason, a young prince, on a perilous journey to retrieve the Golden Fleece of Kolchis.  He travels with a crew of heroes who man their vessel, the Argo.  Throughout his adventures, he has to triumph over obstacles from clashing rocks and fire-breathing bulls.  I've liked it so far!

I'm really excited to go see "National Treasure 2" this afternoon!  It got bad reviews, but everyone I've asked said that it was really good.  We'll see.  You can expect a review when I get back later.

Saturday, December 22, 2007

28 Places, Part 2

Here are some cool pictures of the places in "28 Places To See Before You Die".  I used Google to get these, because my Internet-Internet transfers are instantaneous and my My Computer-Internet transfers are the really slow ones.

Mesa Verde -

Pompeii -

Tikal -

Petra -

Iguazu Falls -

Machu Picchu -

Angkor Wat -

Galápagos Islands (cute tortoise!) -

Winter Dance

ERG!  Only two of the eight pictures I tried to load worked!  There was a good of one of Turtles and Ardvark (I think she was sticking her tongue out) among others.  Well, here the two that came up!

Groblette and Ardvark -

Norbert's Mother and Jsonri -

Friday, December 21, 2007

28 Places To See Before You Die

Yay!  Break!

Smithsonian published "28 Places To See Before You Die".  The pictures are awesome!  (*I've been to two of them so far!)

~ Mesa Verde

~ Pompeii

~ Tikal

~ Petra (it mentioned my x-great-uncle!)

~ Pyramids of Giza

~ Taj Mahal (my cousin just saw that over Thanksgiving Break)

~ Easter Island

~ The Great Wall

~ Aurora Borealis

~ Serengeti

~ Iguazu Falls

~ Machu Picchu

~ The Louvre*

~ Zen Garden of Kyoto

~ Uffizi Gallery

~ Fallingwater

~ Yangtze River

~ Antarctica

~ Mount Kilimanjaro

~ Grand Canyon

~ Pagan

~ Parthenon

~ Angkor Wat

~ Ephesus

~ Venice*

~ Amazon Rain Forest

~ Great Barrier Reef

~ Galápagos Islands

Sounds good to me!

I have to leave for Tae Kwon Do soon, but I'll be posting pictures from the dance on my next entry.  (I haven't forgotten, Shoetopia Citizen!)

Temples of Pagan (they had a better one in the magazine, but I didn't have time to load it!) -

Thursday, December 20, 2007

The Politically Correct "Three Little Pigs"

Mr. Green read us this story today!  I love it! -

Once there were 3 little pigs who lived together in mutual respect and in harmony with their environment. Using materials that were indigenous to the area they each built a beautiful house. One pig built a house of straw, one a house of sticks, and one a house of dung, clay and creeper vines shaped into bricks and baked in a small kiln. When they were finished, the pigs were satisfied with their work and settled back to live in peace and self-determination.

But their idyll was soon shattered. One day, along came a big, bad wolf with expansionist ideas. He saw the pigs and grew very hungry in both a physical and ideological sense.

When the pigs saw the wolf, they ran into the house of straw. The wolf ran up to the house and banged on the door, shouting, "Little pigs, little pigs, let me in!"

The pigs shouted back, "Your gunboat tactics hold no fear for pigs defending their homes and culture."

But the wolf wasn't to be denied what he thought was his manifest destiny. So he huffed and puffed and blew down the house of straw. The frightened pigs ran to the house of sticks, with the wolf in hot pursuit. Where the house had stood, other wolves bought up the land and started a banana plantation.

At the house of sticks, the wolf again banged on the door and shouted, "Little, pigs, little pigs, let me in!"

The pigs shouted back, "Go to hell, you carnivorous, imperialistic oppressor!"

At this the wolf huffed and puffed and blew down the house of sticks. The pigs ran to the house of bricks, with the wolf close at their heels. Where the house of sticks had stood, other wolves built a time-share condo resort complex for vacationing wolves, with each unit a fibreglass reconstruction of the house of sticks, as well as native curio shops, snorkelling and dolphin shows.

At the house of bricks, the wolf again banged on the door and shouted, "Little pigs, little pigs, let me in!"

This time in response, the pigs sang songs of solidarity and wrote letters of protest to the United Nations.

By now the wolf was getting angry at the pigs' refusal to see the situation from the carnivore's point of view. So he huffed and puffed, and huffed and puffed, then grabbed his chest and fell over dead from a massive heart attack brought on from eating too many fatty foods.

The three little pigs rejoiced that justice had triumphed and did a little dance around the corpse of the wolf. Their next step was to liberate their homeland. They gathered together a band of other pigs who had been forced off their lands. This new brigade of porcinistas attacked the resort complex with machine-guns and rocket launchers and slaughtered the cruel wolf oppressors, sending a clear signal to the rest of the hemisphere not to meddle in their internal affairs. Then the pigs set up a model socialist democracy with free education, universal health care and affordable housing for everyone.

Please note: The wolf in this story was a metaphorical construct. No actual wolves were harmed in the writing of the story.

Ooops!

OOOPS!

John Edwards got his mistress pregnant according to WOWO!  DNA tests haven't been taken as far as I've heard, but I'm sure this'll do wonders for his campaign!  It doesn't really matter whether or not it's true at this point, the damage has already been done.  (I'm reporting this in my awesome political section of Studio 94! (but we won't see it until we get back for the Flexible and Impartial Winter Solstice Holiday Break))

I can't wait for our partAY tomorrow!  We get to watch "National Treasure"!  Hooray!  And of course we have the dance (Crank That!)!

And middle school's done with finals, too!  The high school has more finals tomorrow, and they don't get a partAY.  That stinks.  They have my condolences...  =(

The most recent polls are going to wipe that (fake) smile off his face.  =P

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Dreams

I had this awesome dream once (it was ages ago, but it's still funny)!

Apparently Turtles and Pandaguy were playing a review game in Brickley's (for some reason he was wearing a dress that day) room, and their team really stunk.  We had arranged to meet in the hallway, sneak back into his room, and then win.  I left Cashen's room and met Turtles and Panda in the hallway, but Groblette wasn't able to get out of Birk's class with a bathroom excuse.

We decided Pandaguy should act like a teacher and ask to borrow Groblette for a minute.  Our teacher of choice was Mr. Brickley.  So Pandaguy had to put on a dress (he had it on for the rest of the dream) and went into Birk's room and asked to borrow Groblette for a moment.

Now that we were all in the hallway, we couldn't figure out how to get back into Brickley's room.  I told everyone that I knew a shortcut.

All the sudden we were in my garage and driving down my driveway towards school.  For some reason, my driveway went through a forest.  The terrain got too rough so we find some bikes (one three-seater for Pandaguy, Groblette, and Turtles and a one-seater for me).  We biked for a while until we got to this waterfall at a sheer cliff and split directions.  We got off the bikes (they went left and I went right).

Then Groblette called over to me, "David, your all alone!".  All the sudden Opal was right next and called back, "No he's not!".  We all got kind of confused at this point.

Next we began climbing up the cliff.  When we finally got to the top, who should be up there but.... (drum roll).... LARA CROFT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lara - "Hey kids!"

Us - "We need to get back to school!"

Lara - "Right-O!" (awesome British accent)

So we all got on motorcycles (that were identical to hers!) and started driving back to school.  Well Lara didn't know where the front entrance was (we went x-country), so we ended up at the 7th Grade wing's doors.  She shot the lock off for us (us - Thanks Lara!) and she drove off.

We entered the wing and turned the corner right into McNiece.  Well his wife had just had a baby and he was telling us all about him.  (Poor kid, he named him Brogan.)  We were just trying to move along, because we didn't want Brickley and the the teachers to know we had gone.

Then without any warning, he exploded at us for being down his hallway.  WHAT ARE YOU DOING DOWN IN THE 7TH GRADE WING?!?!?!  and all that jazz.  Then Turtles walked squarely in front of him, "I'm so sorry I have to do this," and gives him a beautiful right hook to the jaw, knocking him up.  So we tied him up with packaging tape and hid him in the janitor's closet.

We ran to the end of the wing, through the Art Department, and down the 8th Grade wing to Brickley's and won the review game.

It was awesome...

I also had another dream that wasn't so colorful more recently.  CWag and I were on the MCMS sidewalk and there were a bunch of Asian people all over the place and we were killing them!  It was really weird.  I did not get that dream.

Monday, December 17, 2007

230th

Guess what today is!  The 230th anniversary of when George Washington made camp with the Continental Army at Valley Forge.  Cool?

Did you know that Friedrich von Steuben's (pronounced STOO, not STOY like Mr. Green does) full name was Baron von Friedrich Wilhem Ludolf Gerhard Augustin Steuben?

A sweet picture of the Fountain of the Four Rivers in Rome -

Sunday, December 16, 2007

Favorite Post #11

Mmmmhhhmmmm...

 

¡Party!

Great party, Norbert's Mother!  That was awesome!\

I really need to get Soulja Boy for my computer.  That song's the best!  And "Thanks for the Memories".  I don't know why I don't have those songs!

And Sissygirl, I completely won that arcade basketball (2/3!!!!!!!!).

I don't really have anything big to say.  That was just so much fun, and I'm still in a party mood.  It ended too soon...  =(

Anyway, happy birthday!

George Washington - Was He or Wasn't He?

More and more people are coming to realize that history can often be conflicting.  It's difficult to find a single answer.  Recently, the outlook on the competence of George Washington has been under speculation.  We always hear about what a marvelous leader he was, holding the army (band?) together until Trenton (which wasn't really a huge victory, especially compared to battles like Saratoga.  It just ended his losing streak since Long Island) when it was stabilized.  Well he wasn't exactly all that he's cut out to be.

Out of the nine battles he fought, he only won three.  Many times the army was only held together due to British stupidity.  They didn't correct their mistakes and kept losing to guerilla tactics.  He almost didn't turn around to attack Yorktown, and the French had to basically drag him into it.  And it doesn't exactly sound to complementary to say that he was a master at running away.

On the other hand, his ability to escape and knowledge of when to call it quits is many times considered one of his greatest assets.  Often people will make the excuse for him that he was just dealt a poor hand of cards between having to bicker with Congress for money and maintain an army with bare minimum (and sometimes less than minimum) supplies and equipment.  He may not have been a tactical genius on the level of Napolean, but he can still be a great leader.  A combination of his brutal discipline (that wasn't widely enforced) and his physical stature made him standard that his men would rally to.

I can see either side when it comes down to Washington's military ability.  It comes down to personal opinion whether or not there may have been more capable leaders who were put under Washington and if you consider his charisma part of his ability.

Today is the Boston Tea Party's 234th anniversary!  Yay!

An awesome picture from Mount Pilatus in Switzerland -

Saturday, December 15, 2007

American Hero Oddities

I haven't written a history article in a while, and I have a little spare time right now.  I swear Mr. Green gets his bonus stories from Don't Know Much About History!  It's had the ones about William Franklin (as a Tory), John Paul (Jones) (killing a member of his crew), and Washington (almost joining the royal navy).  It didn't have the one about Patrick Henry's insane wife (medically), and for some reason I think I'm missing one.

Oh, and I forgot to mention I could've killed Clink during the Johnny Tremain unit!  She said Dr. Church didn't exist!  I was screaming inside me head.  He was the American caught spying for the British, and she told our class that he was made up by the author to give the book a suspicious character.  Grr... =(

Anyway!

Samuel Adams is an interesting guy.  He squandered his inheritance, ruined the family brewery business, and failed miserably as a tax collector.  But he was a genius at influencing and really good at getting people ticked off.  He was a patriotic extremist and mastermind behind the Boston Tea  Party.  He had no knowledge or capabilities for peace though, and all but disappeared from history after the end of the war.  One of his final, immortalized moments was quite ironically drawing up the Riot Act as part of the Massachusetts legislature.  It stated that any one taking part in a revolution against the government could be jailed without trial (this was around the time of Shay's Rebellion).  He felt that rebelling against a monarchy was one thing, while rebelling against a republic was punishable by death.  Sure doesn't seem like the Sam Adams people normally think of.

Dr. Benjamin Church was anything but a hero, but he's interesting anyway so I included him anyway.  He was (as stated above) the first American caught spying for the British, but quite ironically was also the first to reach the victims (?) (it's not an exaggeration to say they asked for it) of the Boston Massacre and treat the wounded.  I won't talk about the other Benjamin we all know, because I've already exposed his big secrets on site.

John Hancock, a man with no military experience whatsoever, was very bitter when George Washington got the post of commander of the Continental Army instead of him.  He got most of his money (he was the richest man in New England before the war) from his uncle, who was a very prominent smuggler.  It's not unlikely that he also inherited a few dubious notions as well.

While in France, Thomas Jefferson may have taken a slave named Sally Hemings as a mistress.  It was part of the campaign mudslinging during his presidential campaign, but the DNA evidence (don't know how they got that) shows that either he one of the younger Jefferson males got her pregnant.  Most likely, it was him.  But you know how it was when a scandal is published in People magazine.  It doesn't matter whether or not it's true (at least for the public's opinion), the damage is already done.  Many know he was also a hypocrite who was disdainful of slavery in the House of Burgesses, but kept many slaves himself.

James Otis was a dear friend, the first ally, and mentally similar to Sam Adams.  He was stopped from getting a seat next to the other great writers and speaker in Revolutionary history due to his medical insanity.  He was in and out of asylums and eventually carted off to the family's country farm where he could do no harm.  (Hey, that rhymed!)

Paul Revere had a small command in the Continental Army after his famous "midnight ride" for which is often remembered.  When he was ordered to march against the British at Penobscot, he instead took them to Boston.  He was stripped of his command and accused of cowardice.  He maintained a smudged reputation ever after, even though he eventually received a court acquittal.  He also (to use one of my favorite phrases) "borrowed without permission" that propaganda print from another artist.  He didn't make the original image of the Boston Massacre.  So not only did he use propaganda, he took his from someone else.

Alexander Hamilton was born illegitimately to a shopkeeper.  His father deserted them.  He was brought to America by sheer coincidence when he caught the eyes of a few wealthy benefactors who paid for him to be sent to King's College.  It's commonly known that he also got into a fatal duel with Aaron Burr, his political rival, but for those who didn't know, he did.  He, like Jefferson, also ended up scandalizing his career with some amorous intrigues.

Something about Francis Marion that isn't so much odd, but just interesting, is that one British officer complained he "would not fight like a Christian".  The British were always into the whole concept of drawing out precise battle plans and then never expecting what they considered informal and unofficial battle strategies, like guerilla tactics.  They didn't get smarter either, because they had made the same mistake (multiple times) during the French and Indian War years earlier.  Out of fairness, America who has had all this time to review the past made the same mistake in Vietnam.

One of the decisive reason that Daniel Morgan chose to join the patriot cause dated back to his experience under Braddock in the French and Indian War.  He was once punished with 500 lashes for getting into a fight with a British officer.  Many years later, he held the same grudge against England and ended up being a key player in the South for the American cause.

They don't teach you all the stories about Mary McCauley Hays (Molly Pitcher), the well known woman who took her husband's place in the battlefield manning artillery after he was wounded.  Of course the textbooks only tell you that and also about her fetching water for the men to combat the heat.  Well, there is also a story they don't tell you in school.  It is said that a cannonball passed between her legs and tore away her petticoats.  She responded to the incident by telling that it was a good thing it didn't hit any higher or it might've taken away something else.

They concludes all the weird stuff I could think of for now!  =)

A random picture of me hugging a giant scarab in the British Museum in London -

Seasons Greetings

I got the most hilarious e-mail ever!  I thought it sounded like something I would write:

To All My Democrat Friends: 
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2008, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. Also, this wish is made without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wish. 
 
To My Republican Friends: 
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

And a gummie bear that had its head torn off and then squished onto a piece of notebook paper of course!  (Don't worry, this is my last one!)

Yay!

My herbst is getting a lot better.  I was able to eat at the Outback last night.  It was kind of funny at Tae Kwon Do, because when I snapped my kicks or punches I could feel it in my teeth.

I went tobogganing today up at Pokagon!  It was awesome!  We had perfect weather.  Everyone got scared off because of the winter storm watch.  Flurries just started when we got home, so we timed that pretty well.

One final down for me.  I don't have any on Monday, so I'm not too flustered this weekend.  I figured I'm safe going to Pokagon and Norbert's Mother's party.

Isn't this a dandy picture of a gummy bear without its head?  (Again, from the trip between Venice and Rome (I got REALLY bored (so I ended up buying The Da Vinci Code (in Italian) and an English-Italian/Italian-English dictionary to keep myself occupied at the next rest stop)))

=)

Oh, and reading Don't Know Much About History taught me today that my birthday (June 11) is the same day that Congress appointed Ben, John, and Tom to write the Declaration of Independence (in 1776 of course).  (Don't you think they sound so much more personable when you call them by their first names?)  Also, John Adams and Thomas Jefferson both died on the same day, July 4, 1826.  The 50-year anniversary of the Declaration.  Creepy much?

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Finals

Erghhh... finals start tomorrow (for me at least).  My herbst (?) isn't getting any better either.  Blaghh... and to make it worse I lost my 100s streak in Green's class.  Poop.

While you enjoying the comfort of reading my woes, please enjoy this fine picture of gummie bears -

Yes, gummie bears are in fact racist.  (JALEN!!!!!!)

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Herpst

Ugh... I hate this new layout.  I can't wait until it changes again.  I think this is the worst one.  I don't even any new abilities, it was just hideousified (yes, alwaysbored, I made that word up).

I got my herpst installed today.  It really stinks.  I sound like a moron when I talk, and eating is really weird.  I can't wait to get rid of it.  Oh, well... I haven't really got anything else to say for today.  I'm done with The Romans for Dummies.  I'm ready to move on to a different book.

More crazy gummy bears -

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Cancellation

A cancellation might be good tomorrow.  That way I can spend a small amount of time and get the same amount done for the history test Thursday.  I'm not looking forward to that.  We got so little time to actually go over it in class.  At least we get a note card for it.  That'll be handy.  Then again, with a cancellation, we lose a lot of time that teachers could use helping us prepare for finals.  A two-hour delay might be better for that reason.

I don't know how often I'm going to be able to post, with finals and whatnot coming up with the end of the semester.  Don't flip if I can't post in a while.  My first final is Friday (science, blagh... my worst subject).  =(

Raldski found an awesome equation in her Algebra 1 book -

Barney + Satan = Brickley

It makes sense BS (Barney and Satan) is the same as Brickley!  =)

Here's some demented gummie bears (switched heads) from a long trip in Europe -

Sunday, December 9, 2007

Bad Machinery Juju

Here's a picture from the snowmobile crash.  My mom found the gas cap fifteen feet away from the site of the crash yesterday.  The entire exhaust system was crushed into the rest of the mechanics.  The area where I put my feet bulged out from the inner workings being forced outwards.

You can see the windshield on the right in the scrub as well.  That's where it (and I) landed.  Luckily we missed the tree, but the snowmobile doesn't look in too good of consdition.  We haven't tried restarting it yet (it shut off a little bit after the impact), but we aren't too hopeful.  It was pretty much worthless from when we got it though.  It used to be my grandpa's.  They don't make the parts for it anymore.

It looks like I ran straight into the tree, but if you look closely, one of the runners actually caught it and when we collided it turned the snowmobile.  I came from the left in the picture.

It really hasn't been my weekend for machines, because my computer's been malfunctioning too.  The desktop tab in the display properties has been completely wiped out.  I don't have any idea why, but it just kind of disappeared.  I've already made one call today about it to my computer guy who used to build mother boards, and he had no idea what to do.  The best we could come up with is to reinstall Windows, but I don't know if all my data would still be here.  Not good...

Saturday, December 8, 2007

Ultimate Favorite Post #1

I figured since we've had 10 "Favorite Posts" I could do an "Ultimate Favorite Post" for everyone's favorite post out of the last 100 posts.  By the way, I'll be uploading a picture of what's left of the snowmobile tomorrow (if you don't know the story, check out the comments on "Pirates 3").

A picture from the Rat-Lockin of Mina after Turtles and Groblette gave her a makeover.

Friday, December 7, 2007

Pirates 3

I saw "Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End" again tonight!  It makes a lot more sense the second time.  I was a little confused the first time I saw it, but everything seems to fit a lot better once you see it again.

I've heard that there'll be a fourth one, but that's unconfirmed as far as I know.  If there will be, it's almost guaranteed to be about the Fountain of Youth.  I don't think they should make another one, because they made the third so epic.  If you made the fourth even more so, it would just be cheesy I think.  I'd probably go see it anyway just because it Pirates of the Caribbean, but I don't know I'd like it.

Yay!  Salsa Day was awesome today!  And someone let my secret slip to Ms. Beachy.  She cornered me at Student Council.  Mr. Brickley's smilies are always watching... always.  (*He draws them open-eyed.*)

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Favorite Post #10

Yup!  =)

The upside-down pyramid at the Louvre taken when I was there -

Elagabalus' Shutopia and Other Extravagances

You probably heard about Elagabalus in the entry about the worst emperors, but I've been reading about him in more detail now.  Some of it's pretty disturbing, so I don't plan on relating that, but there were some other more appropriate things about him.  The difference between Elagabalus and one of the "Five Good Emperors" (Nerva, Trajan, Hadrian, Antoninus Pius, and Marcus Aurelius) is so colossal, it's sometimes hard to imagine they are part of the same empire.

Before we get started dissing Elagabalus, I should mention he had one serious agenda, otherwise ruling the Empire didn't matter at all to him.  You may have read before he was trying to reestablish the worship of the Sun-God, Heliogabalus (that's how he got his nickname "Elagabalus" if you caught that connection (oddly like Amenhotep IV changing his name to "Akhenaten" after his fanatical obsession with Aten)).  But as far as a political schedule went, it was just that.  He actually banned all other cults besides Heliogabulus' and the worship of the Great Mother (Cybele, also earlier discussed (with the creepy, cutting followers)) if that tells you anything about his lovely personality.

He had a lot of different homosexual antics that I won't go into, but just know it wasn't pleasant and that he was definitely wasted the years he reigned doing a bunch of stuff he shouldn't have been!

His second wife was a Vestal Virgin (gasp!).  If you don't know about the Vestal Virgins, they served 30 years worshipping Vesta in the Hall of Vesta near the Forum.  They were ruthlessly punished by being burned alive and buried in an unmarked grave if they lost their virginity.  This was especially unfair when they were raped, but it did happen!  The people (obviously) made him divorce her though.

As far as extravagances go; he had his bath perfumed with saffron, his couches made of silver with cushions stuffed with rabbit fur and patridge feathers, lions and leopards for pets, drove chariots pulled by exotic animals, such as elephants, stags, tigers, and lions among others, wore clothes of pure silk, never wore the same shoes twice (I officially dedicate that fact to Katharine!), sometimes invited eight men with the same disability to dinner, such as eight deaf men, eight one-eyed men, or eight bald men.

You can tell he was obviously loved by the people!  Actually he and his mother were killed and their bodies dragged around Rome before being thrown in the Tiber.  No other emperor before him had been humiliated like that before, however degenerate they may have been!

A coin depicting Elagabalus -

A very random picture of my manikin head wearing the Atef Crown.

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Worst Medieval Baby Names

If you don't like your name (or even if you do) it could've been much worse in Medieval times.  Here's a list of the worst Medieval baby names compiled by The Worst-Case Scenario Almanac: History.

Male -

~ Ailwin

~ Clovis

~ Horsa

~ Hunwald

~ Lothar

~ Thrydwulf

~ Wuffa

Female -

~ Amalasuntha

~ Berthefried

~ Earcongota

~ Hawisa

~ Malota

~ Sexburg

~ Ultrogotha

Happy First Day of Hanukhah!  (And Snow-Day too!)

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Defeating the Spanish Armada

There's section of The Worst-Case Scenario Almanac: History devoted to "HOW TO DEFEAT THE SPANISH ARMADA".  (With a lovely illustration!)

"1.  Assemble a large fleet of smaller ships.  The Spanish armada relies on its hulking galleons-40 warships with thick, heavy hulls and numberous powerful, short-ranged cannons.  Though these ships are formidable, they are slow-moving, with limited reaction time.  Warships with smaller, thinner hulls, built for speed rather than for staying power, can outmaneuver the galleons in battle.  Gain an additional advantage by amassing a fleet that outnumbers the Spanish galleons so you can gang up on larger ships."

"2.  Employ long-range weapons.  The guns on the Spanish ships shot heavy cannonballs, capable of devastating any ship within their range, but they are difficult to load in the heat of a battle, and the cannons are only capable of throwing the shots a short distance.  Equip your ships with long-barreled cannons that shoot smaller cannonballs a greater distance, allowing you to fight from farther away, out of range of the Spanish guns.  These cannons have the added benefit of being faster and easier to load, allowing you to get off more shots more quickly."

"3.  Prevent the Spanish from picking up reinforcements.  Spain has the best-trained, most efficient infantry in Europe.  Their huge galleons, accompanied by dozens of support and supply ships, already carry tens of thousands of soldiers proficient at hand-to-hand combat.  If they are able to connect with more troops from the land, they will break past your fleet and invade your homeland.  Block them from contacting armies in nearby territories under their control."

"4.  Launch fire ships to force the Spanish to break formation.  The armada sails in a defensive crescent formation, making it impossible for your ships to approach any single warship without being destroyed by others nearby.  To break up the formation, surprise the Spanish by discharging several fire ships into their midst.  Fire ships are old vessels covered in combustible material such as tar, sulfur, pitch, and tallow that are lit on fire and blown into the enemy's formation by the wind.  Wooden warships, with their sails and barrels of gunpowder, are highly flammable and can easily catch fire; the Spanish will be forced to break formation to sail away from the potential danger."

"5.  Attack long ships during the confusion.  Once the Spanish have scattered to flee the fire ships, overwhelm individual ships cut off from their allies by attacking each with several of your own swift, small, heavily armed boats.  If necessary, board their ships and employ hand-to-hand combat to overtake the vessel and capture or destroy it."

"6.  Block convenient escape routes.  After a successful battle, prevent any retreating Spanish ships from taking the fastest routes back to Spain by positioning your own fleet in the way.  Force the armada to sail home through unfamiliar territory to cause additional damage to their ships."

Saturday, December 1, 2007

This Month In History

Smithsonian magazines always have a department for "This Month In History" that I find pretty interesting.  They have a tendency not to go back to far in opinion, but I still appreciate it all the same.

230 years ago, George Washington and the Continental Army settled down at their Valley Forge encampment on December 19,1777.  They would stay there for the next six months, enduring the elements, illness, and supply shortages.  They would build 2,000 log huts and train for future encounters as well.  2,000 of the 12,000 soldiers died by June.

130 years ago, Thomas Edison applied for a patent for his phonograph on December 24, 1877.  The patent was granted in February, and then he began his work on inventing the light bulb.

120 years ago, Arthur Conan Doyle published his first story about the genius-detective, Sherlock Holmes.  Sherlock would be the subject of 60 works by Doyle.  By the way, Sherlock never said, "Elementary, my dear Watson."  That's a common misconception.

60 years ago, John Bardeen and Walter Brattain, physcisits of Bell Labs, would create the first transistor with a wire, a paper clip, gold folil, and germanium connected to a power source.  Their boss, William Shockley, made improvements on the design, leading to smaller electronics and the semi-conductor era in industry.  All three were awarded the Nobel Prize in Physics.

40 years a go, Christiaan Barnard, a South African surgeon, performs the first human heart transplant on December 3, 1967.  The procedure took nine hours to give Louis Washkansky the hear of Denise Darvall, a car crash victim in Capetown.  Washkansky died 18 days later of pneumonia.

Friday, November 30, 2007

What He Did Wrong

Freemasonry had its critics in America, just as it did in Britain.  The strictest Lutheran sects did not like the tolerant ideas of deism at all.  They criticized the Freemasons for their secrecy.  Soon after the Philadelphia lodge was founded, it was involved in a very unfortunate scandal, concerning a foolish apothecary, burning alcohol, and a big mistake made by one of the greatest thinkers and Founding Fathers recognized internationally.

An apothecary in Philadelphia, Evan Jones, had an apprentice, Daniel Rees, who was eager to learn the secrets of the mason craft.  One night he and his other apprentices decided to play a joke on Rees.  They dressed up in elaborate devil costumes and told him he had to swear allegiance to the devil to join the Freemasons, which in reality wasn't anything like the true initiation ceremony.  It was meant to be just a joke.  Jones then dropped some burning brandy on him, was caused severe infections that Rees died of some days later.  Ooops.

The well known Freemason and thinker, Ben Franklin, had some terrible connections to the crime.  When Jones told him of the trick, he actually thought it would be a good joke.  He later regretted this of course.  Franklin frantically attempted to contact Rees when he decided that the joke was in bad taste, but he obviously failed in doing so.  Franklin would give evidence at Jones’ trial against him on charges of manslaughter.  He then published a statement denying that Jones and the others were actually Freemasons and was a strong critic of their horrible behavior.

Freemasonry survived and by the 1940s was founded firmly in Philadelphia. He would be a very active and enthusiastic mason.  In 1747 he was Provincial Grand Master of Pennsylvania (he was in charge of all the lodges in the colony and reported only to the English Grand Lodge).  For sixteen years he was in charge of Philadelphia’s post office from 1737-1753.  Through all those years there is no doubt the unlucky incident weighed on Franklin’s mind. 

 

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Lost and Found

Well my camera was found and returned to me!  I put new batteries in it, and it went screwy.  The lens kept going out and then back in, and the pictures had a heavy purple tinge to them.  However, the memory card was in perfect order.  I moved it over to my new camera and was able to download the pictures from the Fall Dance to my computer with a problem.  Those pictures are from over a month ago, so must of the "couples" are out of date.  I just uploaded a cool picture of Groblette, Mina, and Norbert's Mother instead.

I have a hilarious book called The Worst Case Scenario Almanac: History that I've had for a while, but haven't shared anything from it yet.  One section I found interesting was "HOW TO ESCAPE IF YOU ARE SEALED INSIDE A PYRAMID".

"1.  Find the King's sarcophagus.  The sarcophagus may be unadorned and simply appear to be a large stone box or coffin.  As you search, pick up useful items left behind by workers, such as additional torches, metal or stone objects that can be used as tools, and any such food or drink.”

“2.  Stand facing the sarcophagus.  The exit from the burial chamber will be on the north wall, which will be on your right.  The doorway will be blocked with a huge, unmovable slab of granite.”

“3.  Make a pick or ax.  Break some of the stone vases in the room and, using a sharp pointed section, fashion an ax by grinding it against the granite.”

“4.  Carve around the slab.  Do not attempt to carve the slab itself.  The passage surrounding the door slab is made of limestone, a rock much softer than granite.  Use the ax to carve an escape hole around the slab.  This is likely to take several days, so ration your food accordingly.”

“5.  Crawl through the hole to access the passageway behind the door.  Continue to follow the corridors as they slope up toward the north.  Determine the proper direction by using additional granite slabs blocking the way as your guide.  Carve around them as necessary.”

“6.  Feel the pyramid blocks as you make your way.  External blocks may be slightly warmer to the touch than those inside.”

“7.  Look for outside light.  As your approach the entrance to the pyramid, light may begin to penetrate into the darkness through cracks in the blocks.”

“8.  Carve around the final slab of rock.  The main entrance will be in the north face of the pyramid about 55 feet above the ground.  Carve around the final slab to reach the outside, taking care not to tumble down the sloped side of the pyramid.”

“9.  Slide or climb down the face of the pyramid.  Flatten your body against the outer wall of the pyramid and inch your way down to the ground.”

All that carving sounds a little tedious to me.  Sliding down a pyramid would be sweet though!  I think I’ll add that to my list next to “bungee jumping”.  =)

Oh, and I forgot my traditional poll for the National Geographic posts last entry.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

National Geographic December 2007 Edition

I got my new edition of National Geographic today.  I read some of the articles, but just skimmed most and looked at the pictures.  Pictures are definitely the best part of these magazines.  “Extreme Dinosaurs” was too much science for me.  “Bethlehem 2007 A.D.” was just depressing.  “Wings of the Albatross” actually had some pretty cool photos, and so did “Frozen Ground”.  I didn’t really like “Enduring Cowboys” though, which wasn’t really that interesting for me.

 

However, in the departments they had two stories on archaeology that were pretty interesting.  A CT scan done by the Egyptian Mummy Project thinks they’ve come closer to uncovering the identity of the mysterious KV55 tomb.  If you don’t know what KV55 is, it’s gold-plated coffin with royal titles, but the names had been chiseled off and part of the face was torn off.  The dead’s identity has been debated upon since its discovery in 1907.

 

The scan discovered that the bones belonged to someone around the age of 60, which fits the description of a lesser-known pharaoh, Smenkhkare.  Smenkhakre also fits the time period of other pharaohs around him, although another king also fits the criteria of that interval in Egyptian history known as Amenhotep IV or better remembered as Akhenaten.

 

Akhenaten is the pharaoh discussed in earlier entries as being known for establishing a monotheistic cult.  Egyptians would’ve had motive for trying to damage the king’s grave, because he was generally considered radical and heretic by the people for trying to establish monotheism in a long-time polytheistic nation.  As an example, imagine President Bush made it law that all Americans had to be Hindu (the first polytheistic religion that came to mind).  The people would have to comply or suffer the consequences until he died (president for life =]).  At that point the new president would bring back freedom of religion and we’d all go back to normal.  I would bet a lot of people would like to get some revenge on President Bush, and desecrating his grave would be a likely response.

 

The second archaeology article was a little bit on the odd side, but none-the-less interesting, about an ancient prosthesis.  Apparently an Egyptian woman had wooden big toe.  It wasn’t only for looks as scuffing on the bottom of the replacement indicates.  The artificial toe was found with the mummy’s body.

An awesome hybrid baboon in the wildlife department -

Rearrangement

I reorganized my room again.  I have this thing for rearranging it.  It makes everything seem so... fresh I guess for lack of better words.  I like the feeling.  But anyway, I attached pictures of it.  Two pictures actually, because I found a way around the one-picture-uploaded-from-your-computer-to-the-Internet-per-entry rule.  I start writing an entry, but just upload a picture to my shoebox.  Then I close out and start a new entry without posting, so I can just transfer from my shoebox to the entry and upload another one without breaking the rule.

It was kind of sad cleaning it up though.  I decided it was time to banish the fantasy books that I used to like so much.  I exiled them all to the attic, so that I would have room on my bookshelf.  That way I have room on my desk shelves for office things.

All that's left (concerning books) on my desk are my fiction thrillers.  They are The Da Vinci Code, Il Codice Da Vinci (The Da Vinci Code in Italian), The Last Templar, The Rule of Four, The Footsteps of God, Angels and Demons, and Deception Point.

Oh!  This is really random, but today is Bill Nye's birthday.  He's either 51 or 52.  I don't remember.

Sunday, November 25, 2007

We Asked for an Emperor, and You Give Us a Loon

The presidents of today definitely have their quirks, but they can't really compare the antics of the Roman emperors.  Somehow they always found a way to choose the worst person possible for the job, or some of the time.  There were definitely good emperors too.

Tiberius, the second emperor and stepson of Augustus, was extremely paranoid, and his family relationships were destroyed because of it.  He once had his neice banished and his great-nephews murdered because he was suspicious that they planned to usurp his power.  If a citizen informed the emperor that someone spoke against him, and the accused was convicted successfully of treason, he would receive 25% of the convict's wealth.  This encouraged people to fib about anyone, the richer the better, because they knew Tiberius was so paranoid that he would find almost anyone guilty.

Caligula can claim a few nut cases to his name.  He declared himself a god while serving as emperor (Caesar and Augustus both received this honor posthumous in a way of acknowledging their achievements).  He had decided early he already was a god.

Caligula (or so a tale is told) was obsessed with the circus (not with clowns, but the older kind with horses and chariot races).  He once had the city silenced so that his favorite horse, Incitatus, wouldn't be bothered before the race began.  Caligula also deliberated on actually making Incitatus a consul (a top seat in the hierarchy with the power of veto) of Rome, though it's unknown if that actually happened.

Ptolemy was a client king (a sort of vassal who ran a province) of Caligula in Egypt.  Ptolemy once showed up in Rome wearing a purple cloak, a color usually symbolizing imperial power.  Caligula had him murdered for showing up that way.

Nero is often remembered for playing the fiddle as Rome burned, but you might've read in a different entry that fiddles weren't even around during that time period.  The Great Fire of Rome was a great opportunity for Nero to get public support as he helped rebuild some of the lost structures.  However, he took a huge chunk of the lost land (120 acres to be exact) to build himself a nice, new palace, complete with an artificial lake, parks, and forests.  Although some of it was later destroyed, most of it survived, but was buried for Trajan's new bathing complex.

Commodus is not forgotten mostly for ending the Age of the Five Good Emperors.  It all went wrong when he handed the imperial powers over to a bunch of corrupt officials.  His death heralded a period of civil war and a succession of soldier emperors.  His name can boast hitting one of the lowest points that the Roman Empire ever endured.

Julianus (ha, ha... his first name was Didius, how cool is that?) was only out for the ambitions of himself and his family.  He didn't even have an army of supporters.  He just offered soldiers some money if they'd make him emperor.  Not surprisingly, everyone got ticked and called for revenge.  He was murdered after two months of civil war.  He never even paid the soldiers anyway!

The short reign of Caracalla was one the oddest and most extreme.  Septimius Severus made he and his brother Geta joint emperors wanting to establish a new imperial dynasty.  Well once Severus died, Caracalla murdered his wife, brother, and all his brother's supporters.  He soon became obsessed that he was a reincarnation of Alexander the Great.  No wonder he was murdered.

Augustus probably wouldn't have bothered establishing the empire if he'd known that 200 years later an idiot like Elagabalus would rule.  A huge sexual pervert, he went as far as to marry a Vestal Virgin (GASP)!  He tried to recreate the Sun-God cult, which only served to horrify the people.  Elagabalus had no idea of the sense of honor that went with the job and was completely indifferent to the dignity of the position.  The people of Rome made sure he suffered a violent death.

Great Fire of Rome -