Inside each of us (or at least me) there lies a special place for the sole purpose of storing the most idiotic and senseless sayings. I wanted to open that up and share a few of these with you.
President George W. Bush -
"I think we can agree. The past is over." (1)
"It's no exaggeration to say that the undecided could go one way or another." (2)
"The law I sign today directs new funds... to the task of collecting vital intelligence... on weapons of mass production." (3)
"It will take time to restore chaos and order." (4)
"Natural gas is hemispheric... because it is a product that we can find in our neighborhood." (5)
Ha, ha... here are some from a variety of people -
When asked if she resented dumb blonde jokes, Dolly Parton fervently responded, "No, for two reasons. One, I know I'm not dumb. Two, I know I'm not blonde."
"I love my job because I get to travel to really far away places like Canada." - Brittany Speares.
"I'm not really dumb... or... well... like... it's like... I don't know... like... an act... I guess - to be cool... I don't know." - Paris Hilton
During a Republican gathering, First Lady Laura Bush was giving a speech describing the accomplishments of her husband. Her words began, "Well, there's not much to say..."
"As I was telling my husb--- As I was telling President Bush..." - Condoleezza Rice
"The Internet is a gateway to get on the Net." - Bob Dole
"Things are more like they are now than they ever were before." - Dwight D. Eisenhower
"China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese." - Charles de Gaulle
Here are some interesting newspaper headlines -
"Police Suspicious After Body Found in Graveyard"
"Male Infertility Can Be Passed on to Children"
"Include Your Children When Baking Cookies"
"British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands"
"Stolen Painting Found by Tree"
"War Dims Hope for Peace"
"House Passes Gas Tax on to Senate"
"Milk Drinkers Turn to Powder"
"Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted"
"Dealers Will Hear Car Talk at Noon"
"Never Withold Herpes from Loved One"
"Whatever Their Motives, Moms Who Kill Kids Still Shock Us"
"Larger Kangaroos Leap Farther, Researchers Find"
"Malls Try to Attract Shoppers"
"Blind Woman Gets New Kidney from Dad She Hasn't Seen in Years"
"Bible Church's Focus Is the Bible"
"Economist Uses Theory to Explain Economy"
"Lawyer Says Client Is Not That Guilty"
"Alzheimer's Center Prepares for an Affair to Remember"
I think those are great. If you want more hilarious quotes and other snipets, I suggest 1001 Dumbest Things Ever Said by Steven D. Price. =)
I thought you might like those.
2 comments:
hahahah thats great
i loved the paris hilton one!
and the dolly parton one
hahahahaha oh boy.
newspaper headlines were great too
I told one of my friends the Dolly Parton one at school, and she said, "Well she's not blonde naturally..." Then someone else said, "That's not the only unnatural thing about her!" Ha, ha... too much fun. =)
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